emily believes that quarter shirts need to make a comeback.

after a long hiatus due to traveling and no internet, emily is back with some memorable quotes, conversations, and happenings:

emily teaches children about the facts of life as they pertain to homosexuality, transexuality, gender reassignment, and hood piercings. 

mother: can i set the parental control on play boy?

aunt: why?

mother: because i'm now in the position of having to explain to my 9 year-old niece what 'hot chicks and wet licks' is.

emily [while having dandelions blown on her]: "i don't think i've been seeded so much in my. life."

the first text message (courtesy of rae) received after a month of no service: "let me taste u. let ur panties flow with ur fragrant vaginal love juices. let me bask in your nector. let me find the sweet, moist, rejuvenating liquid of life."

the telemarketer that called looking for an 'm. lewinski'. he was close in the respect that he called a large brunette with an easy outlook on life.